How to Manage Stress

Stress is part of life. If you are living life, then at some point in your day or week or month, you’ll be stressed.

In this modern world, it is difficult to avoid stress. With technology and the pace at which things are moving, stress has become even more pronounced than it used to be.

Where one had to wait months before getting a response after a letter had been posted, one can get a response within a few minutes of sending out an email. Ofcourse, this is a good thing because things are getting done faster, but it also means that we have to work faster.

Unfortunately, this means that we have to live with stress. The only way to avoid stress is to become a monk and live in the mountains, far from what we call life.

On the bright side, we can certainly reduce stress if we put a conscious effort towards managing it effectively.

What is stress?

In order to manage stress effectively, we need to understand what it is.

In layman’s terms (or my terms), stress is the body’s reactive response to any threat it faces.

When the mind believes the body is facing a threat, it goes into alert mode directing all the body’s energy into a “fight or flight” mode.

This means that you can either fight or run to escape the threat.

This is a mechanism that we evolved with to survive when we were still cavemen/women. It would enable us to be prepared for major threats such as lions, tigers, you know anything that wants to eat you. Which was great, because we are still around today.

Had this stress mechanism not developed in humans, our great great great great great great great grand parents would probably just have been another meal away for the predators.

The stress response would last for a few minutes as long as the threat is around and would disappear once the threat is gone. The body would then go back to operating normally. It was a good thing.

In today’s world, we don’t face lions or tigers, but we face threats constantly throughout the day in the form of work deadlines, social media, public speaking, social judgement whether from your friends, family, peers, finding love, dealing with a divorce, worrying about your child’s education, crime, and so on and so forth. There’s always something that’s making your life difficult.

Your mind perceives all these as threats. This means that our minds are sending our bodies into a stress response constantly throughout our day everyday. Can you imagine what our body is going through? No wonder there are so many mental issues and people are rarely happy. The body does not have a moment to be stress free.

Our body was not meant to be stressed out all the time. We have normalised being stressed. In fact, if you are stressed, you are probably doing something worthwhile in your life.

Stress causes so many problems which you may be shocked to hear about. To me, it feels like one of the major reasons why people fall sick physically and mentally in the first place.

What problems can stress cause?

Lack of Sleep

The biggest one for me is sleep. When you are stressed, your mind will be on overdrive preventing you from sleeping well. Without good sleep, you can get so many problems such as:

Alzheimer’s disease
A weak immune system – affecting your ability to fight off other diseases
Increased risk of stroke/ coronary heart disease
Increased risk of cancer
Inability to think – cognitive failure – a bit like what happens to me immediately when I don’t get sleep
Forgetfulness
Men have diminished libido
Increased weight
Increased diabetes risk
Poor skin condition i.e. more wrinkles, reduced elasticity

Headaches & Muscle Aches

Chronic stress over a period of time can cause headaches, migraines and muscle aches. If you’re constantly stressed, your muscles may not have a chance to relax causing the aches.

I can 100% vouch for migraines & headaches because I get these if I’m stressed.

As well as the physical pain involved, I lose 2 days of work and life because I can’t do anything due to the migraines and headaches.

Weak Immune System

Stress hormones can affect your immune system leaving you susceptible to disease. You’ll find that you catch colds more frequently when you are stressed.

As well as directly affecting the immune system, there is a double effect here – because when you are stressed, you probably won’t eat well or exercise which weakens your immune system even further.

Can affect the digestive system

Stress can cause constipation, diarrhoea, stomach ache, vomiting or nausea. What? How can stress affect the gut? Well, stress can affect the way food moves in your body. Secondly, when you are stressed, you may not even chew your food well before swallowing or you may eat the wrong foods.

Breathing and Heart Problems

When you are stressed, you tend to breath faster which may cause problems if you have asthma.

Stress also means that the heart pumps faster which can raise blood pressure. This can increase the chance of getting a stroke or heart attack.

Affects the reproductive system

Under stress, women can have more painful periods which can also be irregular and heavy. They can also have reduced sex drive.

Men can experience reduced sex drive, negative impact on sperm production, erectile dysfunction or impotence.

As you can see stress can affect several systems of the body and in order to live healthily, you must learn how to manage stress effectively.

There are certain ways that I manage my stress which may or may not help you. These things may work differently for different people but it’s worth trying them to see if they help you.

Meditation and Yoga

My favourite way to manage stress is via yoga and meditation.

Meditation helps with understanding the root cause of my stress. It calms my mind, helps me breath and focus on the problem. When I meditate, I’m able to understand why I’m stressed, think of solutions and how to move forward. This directly helps reduce my stress.

I combine yoga with meditation because after a good meditation session, I’m able to do yoga better. I feel that a good meditation session makes my yoga session twice as relaxing. Yoga enables me to stretch and helps relax any tense muscles resulting from stress.

After meditation and yoga, both the mind and body feel more relaxed.

Walking in nature

Another method that helps manage my stress is going for a walk in nature. It could be a park or reserve, but anything outdoors truly feels refreshing.

It enables me to get fresh air, breathe better and think clearer. Being outdoors allows me to get a fresh perspective on things and inspires me to find solutions too, reducing my stress levels.

Working on your goals, finances or love life

What is causing your stress? That is a very important question. Without knowing the answer to this, you can not manage your stress.

Once you know the cause of your stress – perhaps it’s work or your finances or your love life etc, you can work on finding a solution

e.g.

You could work harder or look for a better higher paying job

You could make an effort to put yourself out there to find someone to date

Being able to resolve the causes of stress in your life will directly affect your stress levels. If you don’t try to do anything about it, then you’ll continue being stressed.

Meeting friends or talking to friends / family

Sometimes the reason for your stress may be to do with someone. Talking directly to that person and resolving the problem can help reduce your stress.

Alternatively, talking to someone you trust about something that’s bothering you can also help reduce your stress. When I have a problem, I talk to my friends and they help me find solutions or give me a different perspective on the matter that helps calm me down.

But I believe just having someone listen to your troubles when you are stressed is also very calming and help you feel better – regardless of whether they give you a solution or not.

Doing an activity that you enjoy

Taking a break from life/work and making time for things you enjoy can make a big difference to how stressed you are. It can make you happier and help you approach stress better.

My mantra is live your life to be happy. Always make time for you, it’s not selfish. By being happy and stress free, you’ll actually be a fun person for others to be around and benefit them too.

Exercise

There’s something about exercise that can get your adrenaline flowing and make you happier.

Exercising can boost both your health and mood reducing the impact of stress.

I especially love dancing because as well as getting the health benefits of exercise, I’m listening to music and moving my body in a way that makes me happy.

Listening to uplifting music

I’m going to give music its own separate paragraph because everyone loves music and it has a way of making people happy.

If you’re feeling stressed, just put on that song that you love and you’ll feel an instant mood lift.

It always works for me, no matter how briefly. It gives my mind that much needed break from stress.

Learn to laugh and be grateful

If you act in a way that means you are happy every day, your stress will be lower.

Yes, we all have problems and stress will remain forever. But we can learn to live better and happier if we learn to laugh.

Look for the bright side of everything that happens in your life.

Learn to be grateful for what you have. Most people don’t even have half of what you do.

Learn to find joy and laughter with people in your life.

All these things will reduce your stress. Often times, we worsen stress because of our behaviour. We make situations worse because we are stressed and unhappy.

Laughing and finding joy in the little things means you’ll respond better to events rather than reacting – ensuring that your stress is lower with better outcomes.

Get a Pet

Do you like dogs or cats? Perhaps a bird or fish?

Getting a pet will instantly lower your stress. I don’t know how but it works.

Just make sure you are willing to take on that extra responsibility.

Accept what’s not in your control

There are some things that we just can’t control. Learn to accept these.

When you accept and let go, your stress will reduce.

It does come down to mindset at some point. Many of us view the same issue in different ways. Some of us make it bigger than it is.

Learning to accept things you don’t have power to change will greatly benefit your mood and stress levels.

Yes, try to do your best and work towards a goal but don’t beat yourself up over something that you have no control on.

Manage how you think

Expanding on the point above, your mindset is very important for stress management.

If you overthink/assume/judge/try to mindread, you are more likely to be stressed.

Learn to manage these one day at a time, and you’ll feel less stressed.

It’s not easy but practice makes perfect.

Make time for Sleep

I know I said stress may affect your sleep. But lack of sleep may also affect your stress by making you less productive.

Listen to calming music, switch off your phone 1 hour before bed and try not to think about anything just before going to bed.

A good night’s sleep will refresh your brain and help you deal better with stress.

Eat well

There is a thing called stress eating.

When you are stressed, you’re likely to eat all the junk and sugary stuff making you feel even worse.

You need to be disciplined enough not to stress eat. Eat well and over time, your mood will improve. Certain foods can actually help improve our mood and reduce stress such as avocados, boiled potatoes, nuts, herbal teas, yoghurt, greens, fruits etc.

Do not succumb to addictive activities such as alcohol consumption, smoking, caffeine etc.

Drinking alcohol, smoking and excessive consumption of caffeine cannot be good for your body.

There are a multitude of problems these activities can cause from cancer to heart disease.

You don’t need that extra stress, do you?

It may help you feel better in the short run but will cause more problems in the long run – which you will have to deal with.

Be mindful and present

Being mindful in the moment allows you to focus on the now. It allows you to forget the past and future.

This gives your mind a break reducing stress.

While it is important to learn from your mistakes from the past and focus on your goals for the future, it is also important to not overly dwell on something that’s already happened or something you don’t even know will happen.

Learn to live in the now. Now is what you can control.

If you do it right, there will be less of a reason for you to stress in the future. 🙂

Get professional help

If you have tried everything but nothing works for you, maybe it is time to seek professional help.

They may help you look over your problems and guide you on how to deal with your stress.

Incase you are not sure about whether you are stressed or not, one or more of these things happen when you are stressed:

You are depressed
You bite your nails
Grind your teeth
Your mind is on overdrive, you are constantly ruminating over things
You don’t eat well (over or under eating regularly)
You are irritable and constantly snap at people
You are always worrying
Smoke or drink alot
You feel restless and anxious
You are tearful
You get panic attacks
You get headaches
You get indigestion or heartburn
You feel sick
You sleep too much or don’t sleep at all
Cognitive problems
Procrastinating

How to manage stress

I hope you found the above article on how to manage stress useful.

Stress is a difficult response to overcome but with practice, you can manage it better.

I still constantly struggle with stress and have accepted it as part of my life but I find that doing all of the things above helps me manage it effectively.

I hope they help you too.